bucket list

i've always wanted to have a photo published on a natgeo magazine. in one of my old journals, i gave myself till i'm 40yo to do that.

i have lots of time.

its the little things that count

i promised myself i'd blog today. about the wonderful first weekend of 2012 spent at sonya's with the loves of my life. i promised myself i'd focus on the details because the details are important and the details are it.

love is in the details. and last weekend, i was in love, all over again.

sometimes i don't know.

Neil's new year's wish

I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes.

Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You're doing things you've never done before, and more importantly, you're Doing Something.

So that's my wish for you, and all of us, and my wish for myself. Make New Mistakes. Make glorious, amazing mistakes. Make mistakes nobody's ever made before. Don't freeze, don't stop, don't worry that it isn't good enough, or it isn't perfect, whatever it is: art, or love, or work or family or life.

Whatever it is you're scared of doing, Do it.

Make your mistakes, next year and forever.

"While it's tempting to play it safe, the more we are willing to risk, the more alive we are. In the end, what we regret most are the chances we never took."

- Alfred Lord Tennyson

annual self assessment

Ok, I guess it hasn't been an annual thing anymore. Well, unless undocumented thoughts every January count.

2011 was deceiving. It was literally a roller coaster emotional ride for me, moments of glee, triumph, success, then anger, disappointment, helplessness. And finally, thank goodness, enlightenment, courage, hope.

My team tired, stressed, working till early morning in preparation for much dreaded much anticipated regional audit.
My team successfully passing it.

Family trip to Shanghai -- it's been ages since I've travelled outside with them. That was fun.
The sad feeling of being left behind when they went to Vietnam. The time has come, I guess, when my absence will not automatically mean an adjustment on their part to accommodate my sched, my life. It's inevitable, but I guess I haven't been paying too much attention -- I'm old now. Well, old-er.

Successful Boracay surprise weekend for K.
And the revelation that came many months after.

S left for the UK, to marry D. A has been in Bangkok for some time, but my inability to maintain long distance relationships have taken its toll on us.
Reconnected, rekindled my bond with P. Forever roomie.

My MA thing delayed for months, with me left hanging and helpless at certain points.
My decision to leave.

That scare just a few days ago here at home.
Hoping the resolution will last.

Finally shared with my brothers and roomies (and K again) a visit to childhood home, though Dahilayan was a fluke.
Sendong.


I embrace 2012. Last year has opened my eyes to so many things that needs to be fixed, mostly about myself.

That person who wrote those journals, those blogs, and took those photos 6, 7 years ago? I miss her a lot. The possibilities that lie ahead of me are great and with a clear direction, I'm so ready to grab each and every one.

Lulundagin ko na, Father.